"The time to relax is when you don't have time for it."

STRESS, BE GONE!

So. It feels as if I've had no time to do anything. It's funny how when you get stressed- well, rather, when "I" get stressed I feel like I will get nothing done and everything seems to make me nervous and jittery and I get a stiff neck and get emotional and frustrated and in turn...sleep. Productive, ey?

Honestly, right now I don't even remember posting anything on Monday. It wasn't until last night in bed that I realized I hadn't posted anything for Tuesday. I considered posting some dumb post but in all honesty, my day wasn't at all interesting and had nothing in the mail so why even write anything?

Monday I got an email from a school I applied to telling me my financial aid application was rejected and I had to resubmit and debating on when they received it and the funds still available I would be able to see how much they could offer me.

I FLIPPED.

My stomach started burning and all I could think of was how the hell I was going to get through college without any help. Moreover, I went into paranoid mode and began to justify the reasons for which there had been a lack of acceptances with the fact that they couldn't tell me I WASN'T ACCEPTED.  Illogical, I know.

So what did I do?  I cleaned.
I had so much nerves and stress and tension and sitting down was only making my head spin so I put on some sweats and an old tee and took to cleaning the bathroom.

On all fours, soup and sponge in hand- I CLEANED THAT BATHROOM LIKE NO BODY'S BUSINESS.

BUBBLES WERE EVERYWHERE.
I scrubbed every part of the toilet and the tub and even the floors and the walls.
Strangely, after I did that I vacuumed my room and I felt...better.


I made a few calls and submitted a few forms and realized my paranoia was not at all even remotely worth it. My forms were fine, I had simply forgot a small detail and their costumer service rep assured me everything was PERFECT.



Yesterday I took a pretty long nap and woke up and decided to make dinner.
I was up until 2 am.
Last time I'm taking a nap.

Today was average.
I have realized that the more stressed I become, the less talkative I am.
Not that I'm very talkative to begin with.
My mind goes blank.
I find myself having nothing to say.
Silence becomes unfortable for me as I realize that if and when a conversation were to start...I'd have no mental capacity to even develop an answer.


WEEEEIIIRRRDDD.
Hopes that today will be RELAXING!
doubt it, seeing as I have a project to do and no freakin' idea on how to do it.
okay, lie.
I do have an idea. :P

-D